Dare To Live Without Limits

By: 
Bryan Golden

Defeat offers you opportunities to learn and grow

You can defeat a problem or be defeated by one. You can suffer a defeat, pick yourself up and become stronger, or give up. Defeat impacts people differently depending on their attitude toward it.
Defeat can propel one to achieve success or it can be an excuse for failure. Defeat can be no more than a minor annoyance or it can be a life-changing event. As with many things, defeat is what you make it.
Defeat can be an invaluable tool to identify areas that need improvement. Strengthening weaknesses is essential to improving your ability to overcome adversity. In order to avoid repeating a mistake, you have to identify its cause. Defeat will do this.
Defeat plays a key role in success yet its power is misunderstood. Do you defeat problems or does adversity defeat you? Defeat is the springboard that can propel a person to attain their goals. Defeat is a seed to be cultivated by definiteness of purpose.
Granted, no one wants to be defeated. Defeat is commonly associated with failure. Defeat carries with it the potential for ridicule and scorn. Fear of defeat limits people, preventing them from achieving their potential.
Defeat is never failure unless you give up. Your mental attitude is what whips you. Defeat is like water. You need a certain amount to stay alive. Too much or too little can have deleterious effects.
Experiencing a setback doesn't mean you are defeated. Only the act of giving up causes you to be defeated. Just get up one more time than you are knocked down and you will keep moving forward.
Fear of defeat causes paralysis that prevents you from taking steps to achieve a goal. If you never even begin a journey your chances of completing it are zero. Once you start, each step brings you closer to your destination.
You can trip and fall many times and still complete your journey as long as your get up each time. But if you fall and decide not to get up, you are defeated and will not reach your destination.
With the right mental attitude, defeat can be transformed from adversary to ally. Defeat serves to identify weaknesses that can be corrected. This is the only way you grow stronger. As you get better and improve, your areas of weakness will change.
Everyone experiences defeat. A novice may be tripped up by the most basic challenges. A seasoned expert will stumble on more complex issues. For example, consider a downhill ski racer. When a person is first learning how to ski, he will start on the smallest hills.
He will fall during the most basic maneuvers. Techniques that an expert will execute without any effort appear beyond the beginner's reach. If a beginner is afraid of falling, he will never attempt any technique that will lead to his improvement.
As a skier improves, he will master increasingly difficult terrain. To become a top competitor, a skier must continually push himself. Both the novice and the expert skier will fall. But the expert will fall in response to much more difficult challenges.
Any skier who is afraid of falling, will never improve. This doesn't mean being reckless and taking stupid risks. It would be lunacy for someone to attempt an expert slope the first day they are on skies. Conversely, the person who is afraid is unwilling to fall at all and will never put on a pair of skies.
Don't be afraid of defeat. Utilize it to identify those areas in need of improvement. Defeat is simply a sign that you are on the path to your destination.

NOW AVAILABLE: "Dare to Live Without Limits," the book. Visit www.BryanGolden.com or your bookstore. Bryan is a management consultant, motivational speaker, author, and adjunct professor. E-mail Bryan at bryan@columnist.com or write him c/o this paper.  2022 Bryan Golden

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